Food. It is my drug of choice. When I am emotional, it comforts me. When I’m bored, it’s my activity. When I’m shopping, it’s my companion. When I’m lonely, it’s my friend. Except when it’s not. It’s Satan’s way of tempting me and killing me in a slow seductive way. Because when it comes to food I have (or had) no control. If it tasted good I could justify eating it. Or drinking it.
About 15 years ago I had a more serious addiction than food. It was soda. Oh my gosh, I could easily wipe out a 12 pack of soda in a day. And it never occurred to me not to do so. My mother has drank soda my entire life, so to me, this was completely normal. Until one day I heard a report that a certain soda brand was kept on board ambulances because it can be used to clean up blood at an accident scene. WHAT?! So I started doing a little research. Soda can also take grease off a car engine. When you put a chicken bone into a glass of this sweet yummy concoction, it will eat away at it in less than 24 hours.
This seemed a little wrong to me.
If this is what it can do then what in the H*** was it doing to my body?! So I swore off it. Well at least the caramelized stuff. Oh but not the sweet lemony clear goodness in a green can. LOL, who was I kidding? Nobody, just myself. Well about 3 years ago I swore off all of it and went to the most perfect beverage on the planet.
God made it for drinking not just washing. Who knew? Oh right, EVERYONE!
Well that helped. I felt better. My teeth improved and my skin cleared. Sure I was visiting the restroom more but that was OK.
But I still had my other addiction.
I don’t know if it’s ever happened to you but I used to think “Oh, I lost 5 lbs, I deserve this ice cream. No big deal” Again, who was I kidding?
Isn’t it interesting that the only person who was fooled was me? Why in all the world would I lie to myself? Why would I try to “fake” diet? I would even start a food diary and I would LIE to myself. I was my own worse enemy. I had no idea how to change.
Oh I always wanted to lose weight. I always wanted to have a flat stomach, toned legs. I wanted to look like someone else. But my mind was nowhere in the vicinity of ready to really change.
But every day is a new day. Yes, my Journey with weight loss has truly begun. Truthfully. But it’s still a daily struggle. Food still seductively calls my name. And sometimes it lures me away. And I beat myself up for it. I berate myself and feel the all consuming guilt. But now, because I have my saving grace. I am able to pull myself out of it and start again.
You see, there’s no more, “I’ll start my diet on Monday” I start right now. Today, this hour, this minute.
My advise to anyone reading this who “wants” to lose weight/get healthy?
Don’t wait. Start right now, where you are. Delete one unhealthy food or drink from your menu. Challenge yourself to drink a glass of water before each meal. Eat something that’s green and raw. Something that grew from God’s soil. (this will eliminate green M&M’s Just FYI) And don’t give up! EVER!
The best reason for doing this? Because you’re worth it. We all are. And we can do it. Together.